


Into my arms

by GreenPhoenix



Category: Oz (TV)
Genre: Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-19
Updated: 2014-07-19
Packaged: 2018-02-09 12:49:21
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,106
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1983606
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GreenPhoenix/pseuds/GreenPhoenix
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A season four reconciliation post “Revenge is sweet” that happens a little slower than in canon. Vaguely AU.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Into my arms

It is the calm after an increasingly fraught storm. Toby hears of Ronnie’s death from agent Taylor. He sits in the interrogation room and watches Taylor fixate his cold gaze on him.  
“Did Keller kill Barlog?” Straight to the point.  
“No”  
“Did he tell you that he would hurt Barlog at any point?”  
“No. They were as close as brothers” Too close.  
“Are you lying mr Beecher? To protect your lover?”  
“He’s not my lover” Not anymore.  
“He was. You could still have some loyalty to him”  
“Not to the point of avoiding the truth” he says, lying through his teeth, and running a hand through his hair. There’s a strong memory of Chris doing that not too long ago.  
“Barlog was about to sell Keller out for a reduced sentence. Did he tell you that?”  
“No. We never spoke of such things”  
“What did you speak of?”  
“Oh you know, the inevitability of taxes and German philosophy. “ And how good Keller was in the sack, a universal truth that.  
“Very funny. Barlog was not a great thinker”  
“No. He didn’t seem like the type. Still, he was a decent man” For a crook.  
“And do you know someone who wanted to harm him? You shared a pod. I heard you fucked him”  
“You hear so many things in this place. The nights are cold”  
“Not that cold. So he never spoke of anyone who wished him ill?”  
“No. But it’s Oz, anyone can die for any reason. Maybe someone wanted his sneakers”  
“His shoes were found on him. He’d also engaged in sexual intercourse before his death”  
“No disrespect to the dead, but he was a slut. He was on his knees for anyone who’d have him. Maybe an affair turned sour?”  
“Weren’t both you and Keller involved with him?”  
“Like I said, the nights are cold. And involved is not the word. I didn’t love him. I have no idea what he and Keller did. If they did anything”  
“This is getting us nowhere Beecher. You can go. I’ll be back if we find new evidence”  
Toby leaves, worried that he might have betrayed Chris more than he already has.

 

Chris is back in their pod, McManus apparently likes repeating himself. The first day Keller doesn’t speak a word to him. Despite having demonstrated his love of sorts by killing Toby’s lovers. When lights go out Chris asks “Did you tell them about Ronnie?”  
“Of course not. I said I knew nothing about his death or your plans to kill him. Would you kill me if I told them?”  
“You know I wouldn’t. “  
“You hate me now” No answer, the night is cold and he misses Chris’ warmth.  
“It’s okay. I hate me too for thinking the worst of you. But I kept your secrets for you. I would never sell you out. I love you”. Chris still says nothing and Toby falls asleep knowing this won’t be easy.

 

He doesn’t usually pray, but now he prays to God and Allah to send Chris back to him. Physically they are beside each other, but not in spirit. He knows it’s only a matter of time. He has faith.

 

He gets a few offers from people who think he’s still the EmCity slut, but he turns them down. Chris will know, and that will look good. He rejects further interactions with Schillinger, sister Pete is not too happy, but it’s all for the best. He hates Vern too much to ever forgive him.

 

Things with Chris do sort of improve; he talks to Toby and smiles at him occasionally. Toby can always feel Chris’ eyes on him, taking note of each movement, every gesture being catalogued. The feelings remain, though true forgiveness hasn’t happened. But it will, he knows that much. He’s careful not to push it, but is content that Chris is always watching him.

 

In the showers he lets his eyes drift to Chris’ body and notices Chris seeing where his eyes are looking. Chris winks at him, and continues washing himself, soaping himself up slowly so Toby can get a good look. It’s flirtatious and hot as hell. He knows that’s as far as Chris will go at least for now. Look but don’t touch.

 

“You kissed and made up yet?” asks Ryan, putting a card down.  
“Why are you curious?”  
“Just askin”  
“We’re fine. We’re getting there. You and Gloria?”  
“It is what it is. I can’t see her as much as I want. At least Claire is out of my hair”  
“Good. Love in Oz, huh?”  
“Better than no love”  
Toby nods. That’s true.

 

At lights out he asks Chris for a truce.  
“A what?”  
“For tonight. You know”  
“Yeah I know. “ says Chris. It’s an okay compromise. They are still not okay, but sex will ease the tension a little. Toby carefully moves against Chris and opens his lips to a hungry kiss. He’s almost forgotten how good that feels. “You are mine,” whispers Chris. All part of the temporary armistice. He agrees and lets Chris possess him roughly and with their hands intertwined. Chris licks away a tear he can’t recall shedding, and runs a hand through his hair. Not forgiven yet, but getting there. There’s a hack with a flashlight that separates them, not their own wills. At least they don’t get sent to the hole.

 

Chris maintains a cold façade the following day, but as ever his focus is on Toby. A fight breaks out between the Aryans and the Homeboys, with Toby somewhere in the middle. Chris is at his side without hesitation, and he gets him to safety while butting some Aryan heads in the process. The combatants get sent to the hole. The look of concern on Chris’ face tells Toby all he needs to know.

 

At night they keep up the truce, frequently. Why not? There’s nothing better to do here. Maybe they’re lying to themselves, for all intents and purposes they’re back together.  
Forgiveness isn’t easy, but it happens sometimes even if you don’t plan on it. Toby realizes he and Chris are as okay as they’re ever going to be without needing to say anything. It should disturb him that it took the deaths of his previous lovers to get here, but he hardly cares. It’s one more sin to add to a mountain of transgressions. He can and will carry the burden. He has no choice. Chris is a good ally to have in a place like this, and he does love him. Always did, no matter how bad things got. Always will, no matter what the future brings.

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by this Nick Cave lyric:
> 
> ”I don't believe in an interventionist God  
> But I know, darling, that you do  
> But if I did I would kneel down and ask Him  
> Not to intervene when it came to you  
> Not to touch a hair on your head  
> To leave you as you are  
> And if He felt He had to direct you  
> Then direct you into my arms”
> 
> Written for the Oz Prompt-a-thon 2014.  
> From ”Into my arms”


End file.
